Today’s post comes courtesy of an anonymous guest writer who is more sexually adventurous than I am.
Menaj et toi. Oh, that fearsome act that always leaves one person the odd man (or woman) out. Or so they say.
Everyone knows someone who will say that while threesomes are great for checking one more thing off “Ye Old Bucket List,” they are pretty crappy if you are actually hoping to derive any pleasure from the proceedings. They tell you, “Oh, we were having great sex and Susie was just sitting in the corner feeling left out and not being any fun.”
Well, I’m here to tell you that a threesome can be fun for everyone. I recently had my first one because, like everyone else, I had to hurry up and get it checked off the ol’ BL while I’m still in my 20s.
Anyway, on this night I was competing in my hometown’s signature sport–drinking–along with my friend *Chloe and her new boyfriend. She’s one of my best friends, and happens to be bisexual. So, on a Tuesday night in a small city in the Midwest, we decided why not have a threesome?
We stumbled back to his place, opened some wine and climbed into his bed. Chloe stripped me naked and started kissing me. Eventually, we all ended up lying horizontal, one next to the other. At one point, both her boyfriend and I reached to finger her, and just both kept doing it. Strangest feeling ever–both to be on the giving, rather than receiving end of this act, and to do it in concert with another person. And yeah, as you’d expect, they both went down on me and me on them. All that stuff. I refrained from actual penetration with *Dave, because well, at the moment it kinda felt like stealing. Having heard that threesomes can cause a jealousy later, I didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable at all or cross the line. Plus, I felt like a big point of the encounter was to bring us closer as friends, so it didn’t feel necessary at the time for me to have sex with her boyfriend.
Looking back on it, perhaps what made it fun was our shared affection for her. After knowing someone for 10 years, it just feels natural to get to know their body and what they like in bed. Plus, I had heard her having sex with boyfriends so many times that I already knew she likes her sex to be loud, dramatic and theatrical. Although her boyfriend knew her for a shorter amount of time, there was still a familiarity there that made it seem like she was our tie that held the whole ordeal in place.
And you may say to yourself, “Bah! That’s not a real threesome!” Maybe it was more like a two-and-a-halfsome, but I’m pretty pleased with the way it turned out. I later awoke to them having loud sex next to me, which was, if anything, the most awkward part of the whole experience. While a big part of the “success” of my own experience was our shared love for my friend, it seems a threesome can be enjoyed by most anyone with the proper boundaries and as long as everyone is on the same page. So if you want my advice, go for that threesome when it comes along because chances are you’ll enjoy yourself.
And hey, that opportunity might never come knocking again.
Or you could take Dan Savage’s advice on the matter:
*Names have been changed.